Role Reversal

I'm beginning to thing that I am slowly reversing roles with my parents.

My mom has a friend. I believe that this person does value my mom's friendship, but a lot of their relationship is one sided. "Let's go shopping. Can you pick me up?". "I want to go somewhere. Can you drive?". Never "Let's meet at the parking lot because it's halfway." or "I'll drive this time and you drive next."

I don't know what the deal is, and I really don't need to. I just know that with the cost of gas, it just doesn't seem right. When I go places with friends, we trade off driving, or chip-in for gas, etc. I remember my mom telling me ages ago that it was the polite thing to do. She grumbled at a few people I was friends with at one time or another (no one who would be reading this) who would call and want me to go somewhere but that involved my mom picking them up and taking them there. "A good friend will meet you halfway in terms of driving, paying, etc." Seems she forgot that.

I could understand if this person didn't drive or have a 2nd car, but that's not the case. I know this person is short of money on occasion, but mom always said that if you don't have the money to contribute, don't expect others to pick up your slack.

Next week, she will be accompanying this person to New Orleans. She wants mom's company. She wants mom's help in setting up for an event. But mom's not invited to the actual event. She can come to the after party, but that's it. She's forked over money and time for this, with little to no return. She was expected to stay in a certain hotel and buy an outfit that met with what they were trying to achieve, but can't come to the event.

So I put on my "mom" hat and said "Jeez. Doesn't seem exactly fair, and if I was expected to fork out a lot of money, and have met with their criteria but aren't good enough to attend, then I wouldn't go. Plain and simple."

She replied that she didn't care (but something told me that deep down she did) and she's always wanted to travel there and was looking forward to sight seeing, but I don't see that happening. I see her tied down with helping set up something she can't go to. And that sucks.

But she's 60 now. I've imparted all the wisdom that I was told over the years. I guess we have to let them go at some point and make mistakes........ :D